{Manufacturing a rough sea.}
Dear you,
If I were to knock upon my neighbours’ door I should not be surprised if it were answered by an elephant upon an earth compactor. I would not an eyelid bat at what to you may sound ridiculous spectacle. For you see that is the noise they make as they clomp, clomp, clomp about their house. They step heavy as an elephant in a tiny urban space. Not that elephants are loud by definition. Nor are elephants not full of grace in my books, with their graceful swing, swing, swing. But perhaps an elephant in a place not quite to their natural fit, perhaps they would sound like this heavy tread I am by day and night subjected to. Now that I ponder my subject further and with big stick prod at it to see what lurks, perhaps these ‘imagined’ elephants are on stilts. Not being the most gymnastic of old birds, an elephant on tall stilts walking about the house, now this, this would be noisy. This is what I shall picture. Either that or a whale crashing and thrashing about. What say you?
Yours with cotton wool in the ear and a frown creasing the brow,
X
+ The whale above is a Sei whale (Balaenoptera borealis) who is known for being a fast swimmer, achieving speeds of up to 50km/h. Almost any kind of plankton, fish and squid will it eat. Range: all oceans (not polar regions)
+ They say that some owners look like their owners. They say that dogs notice people their owners’ dislike. This is embarrassingly true. Percy has taken a severe disliking to our next-door neighbours. They converse, he woofs. They slam a door, he barks. They throw a ball at our fence and Percy prepares counter retaliation. He has become the neighbourhood noise police. He has detected the anxiety and I cannot do anything to change it, it seems. I try to bluff, to act nonchalant, but Percy is not buying. It is somewhat embarrassing to see my own anxieties in physical form there on the couch. My happy canine hound has become the embodiment of neighbourhood displeasure. Canine doctor, please advise!